Hello! It’s been a while since I last found the time, and motivation, to blog but here I am still alive, drowning in work, yes, but very much still alive.
For those of you who don’t know, I’ve just started studying a-levels at sixth form college. Everyone says the jump from GCSEs to a-levels is so big and despite being told this repetitively throughout last year, it still took me by surprise. It’s not that a-levels are much harder than GCSEs in regards to the actual content we have to learn – don’t get me wrong it is inuch greater depth than at school but it’s not that difficult that you can’t understand what you’re learning as such – it’s the fact that teachers expect so much from you that shocked me.
It’s not the homework, even though the sheer volume of it does eat up my weekends most weeks, I can cope with that. It’s everything else that I’m struggling with. Being expected to remember and recall every single bit of information you’ve learnt about so far on the spot (half the stuff I’m sure we haven’t even learnt but we are questioned on it anyway), is what’s hard. And being expected to find time to do extra research outside of class on top of all our homework. It just feels like whatever I do it’s never good enough.
I’ve spent hours and hours on homework tasks these past few weeks, using up all my energy and putting all my effort into them but still am told by my teachers that I ‘could’ve done more’. I spent most of yesterday revising for a geography test and was feeling confident that I actually knew and understood what we’ve learnt so far yet when I opened the test, I found I was unable to answer half the questions.
On top of this, I’m finding it hard to balance all of my subjects. Prior to this week, I’d been trying to spend equal time on each yet found that that meant I’ve been not quite keeping up to the teachers high standards as I hadn’t been dedicating enough time to each (there are only 24 hrs in a day and I am not a superhuman so idk what they expect from me seriously) so this week I’ve dedicated the most time to geography because of the end of topic test we had today but now I’ve started falling behind with my work in French and history! You can’t win with a-levels, you really can’t.
So I don’t know which subjects to prioritise, if any. I just want to do equally well in all three but it seems impossible to stay on top of everything. It feels like whenever I go to lesson, we learn about 2356 billion new things and I just get further and further behind. I can’t even remember what I learnt in class today because my head is just one huge cluttered mess of facts that I don’t know what to with. What’s worse is most other people seem to give off the general impression that they’re coping which just makes me feel even worse about my capabilities. Everyone seems to be able to absorb the information being thrown at them whereas my ‘knowledge absorption sponge’ is full of holes and I’m lucky if I can retain one thing after each lesson.
So yeah my general impression of a-levels at the moment is that no matter how hard I try, it’ll never be good enough to meet the teacher’s – or my own – standards.
Anyway, are you doing a-levels? How are you getting on with school? Let me know! 🙂